The Longest Night

December 22, 2015 - the winter solstice - the shortest day, the longest night.

I didn't sleep well last night. It felt like I was out of bed more than in bed. At one point, around 2:00am I thought, I'm so awake, I wish it was morning. But I went back to bed and eventually fell asleep. Sometimes the night feels endless and the longing for the break of day leads to desperation. Spiritually speaking, I've been there too...in long periods of darkness due to disappointment, disillusionment, confusion, loneliness, loss, frustration, physical illness, or a broken relationship. Sometimes it's even hard to hear Father's voice in those dark moments. And it often feels endless, just like my experience last night - when will the morning come?

If you find yourself wandering in the longest night, remember that morning always comes. Always. God set boundaries to day and night. He is faithful. Day always comes. The same is true for you. Your longest night, spiritually speaking, has a boundary. But while you are in the midst of the darkness, look around, what do you see? Can you sense God's presence with you (even if His voice seems muffled)? What are the little blessings you experience despite the darkness? What rays of hope are beginning to sliver the darkness? Look around, you may be surprised with what you see.

As we approach the holidays - the celebration of the birth of our King - the excitement of ringing in the new year, to many this is a season of HOPE and JOY. To others, it's a reminder of what they no longer have...for those of you in that season, we hold you in prayer before the Lord. Hope comes. He came. And He is coming again. The longest night will be over and God will begin to expand the boundaries of day. And that begins tomorrow.

Happy Winter Solstice and Merry Christmas. To you, may God's blessings fall heavy upon you in 2016.

deAnn Roe

Artists in Community

A small glimpse into the Night of Worship.

I just returned from the Creative Church Conference set in the stunningly beautiful city of Boise, Idaho (I found out I was mispronouncing it - I was saying "boy-zee" when it's actually pronounced "boy-see"). Love the city! Love Vineyard Boise, the church that hosted the conference. Love VineArts (the arts ministry of the church) led by the amazing Jessie Nilo and her equally amazing team of loving artists. The theme of the conference: Artists in Community. Yes, it is possible.

Having just returned home yesterday, in the middle of the night, I'm still exploring all that God has deposited in me while there. It's very hard to put into words at this point. But what I have come away with the most is the impact of a deeply loving community of creatives and artists. A community where lines are blurred between "professional" artists and "emerging" artists. Where love for Jesus  and love for others reigns FAR above what our art looks like, what gallery its hanging in, or if we have a spectacular home studio or not. Love. Period. I'm forever changed by the presence of the Holy Spirit who was very present at the conference. My spiritual family grew as I was introduced to all the new siblings in Christ that I met. My heart has expanded. God is so full of goodness!

If you want to be blown away by the love God has for you, watch this sermon by potter/pastor Dave Blakeslee (link below). He uses the art of throwing pots as a powerful illustration for his sermons. You can see it here. I highly recommend it.

Pastor Dave Blakeslee setting up for his Sunday message.

I Played My Best for Him

 

For some reason this year Christmas music has really been speaking to me. Lyrics I've heard over and over have become mute to my ears and heart. However, God really captured my emotions one day when the familiar song, "Little Drummer Boy" came on my Pandora Christmas Radio Songs station. I've always dismissed the song, only hearing the prominent "pa rum pum pum pum" segments. But this time, I really heard the lyrics. Actually they went straight to my heart. I'd like to share them with you, minus the "pa rum pum pum pum's."

Come they told me,
A new born King to see,
Our finest gifts we bring,
To lay before the King.


So to honor Him,
When we come.


Little baby,
I am a poor boy too,
I have no gift to bring,
That's fit to give the King.

Shall I play for you
On my drum?


Mary nodded,
The ox and lamb kept time,
I played my drum for Him,
I played my best for Him.


Then He smiled at me,
Me and my drum.


There isn't a line in this song that doesn't speak to me. I can relate to the little drummer boy, as I believe all artists can. I am a poor boy (girl, actually), with no gifts to bring, fit to give a King (Jesus). But all He wants is for us to show up and play our best for Him (or paint our best for Him, draw our best for Him, write our best for Him, or create our best for Him).

Then He smiled at me, me and my drum (or canvas, etc.)

As we head into the last few days before Christmas, remember the words of the "Little Drummer Boy." It has a deep spiritual message for us all. Often we judge our "best" by how the world sees our artwork. But God doesn't see it that way. As an offering for Him, He only expects we show up and do our very best.

Then He smiles at you, you and your art...

Graceand peace,
Merry Christmas,
deAnn

Friday Prayer

Forgive me, Lord Jesus, for the things that I have done that make me feel uncomfortable in Your presence.  The front that I polish so well for people to see does not deceive You. 

For You know every thought that has left its shadow on my memory.  You have marked every motive that curdled something sweet within me. 

I acknowledge, with sorrow and true repentance, that:

          I have desired that which I should not have;

          I have toyed with what I knew was not for me;

          I have been preoccupied with self-interest;

          I have invited unclean thoughts into my mind and

entertained them as honored guests.

          My ears have often been deaf to Your whisper;

          My eyes have been often been blind to the signs of

Your guidance. 

Make me willing to be changed, even though it requires surgery of the soul. And the therapy of discipline. 

Make my heart warm and soft, that I may receive and accept now the blessings of Your forgiveness. 

~written by Peter Marshall

Incredible Dots

WOW... this is amazing work by artist Miguel Endara.

Creative Block Stinks

Below is a quote from page 165 in Julia Cameron's book The Artist's Way. The chapter is about creative blocks and Julia states, "Every creative person has myriad ways to block creativity. Each of us favors one or two ways particularly toxic to us because they block us so effectively." (Yes, she did say that.)

"Blocking is essentially an issue of faith. Rather than trust our intuition, our talent, our skill, our desire, we fear where our Creator is taking us with this creativity. Rather than paint, write, dance, audition, and see where it takes us, we pick up a block. Blocked, we know who and what we are: unhappy people. Unblocked, we may be something much more threatening - happy. For most of us, happy is terrifying, unfamiliar, out of control, too risky."

This idea that we place blocks in the path of our own creativity is intriquing. My first reaction was, "that's not true!" But the more I reflect on this, I tend to agree, at least in my creative life. In a time of prayer, a visual metaphore will come to mind. I can see it clearly as a watercolor painting. It always has to do with God revealing something to me about my life or where I am with Him. I desire to get out my watercolors and try to translate the image in my mind and heart onto the paper. But often I don't get beyond the desire. Self-doubt stops me cold in my tracks. The inner-critic begins to chant in my mind, "You can't paint that. You don't know how to use watercolors correctly. You are going to make a mess of this." Yes, I'm sad to say that I let the evil one distract me and discourage me. I let him. That means I created, or allowed, the block. But why? I'll tell you why - fear.

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10


However, when I recall Who's on my side, I pursue (through lots of prayer). Finally, I put the paint onto the paper and I feel a sense of relief, a deep feeling of God's presense with me and even, dare I say, I feel His pleasure. I did it. I gave it my best shot. I obeyed the divine nudge in my spirit to create the image that needed to be birthed.
 
The next time you feel a creative block, consider its source. Then consider this truth: God is your creative source. You have the Holy Spirit. Nothing is impossible. For in Him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things have been created through Him and for Him. Colossians 1:16.
 
What is your block? What keeps you from expressing and developing your creative voice, be it writing or visual arts? It's my prayer that you will acknowlege the block, then kindly chuck it out the window. Move forward with your creative endeavor, inviting Jesus into the process with you. Pay attention to divine nudges and inspiration when they come. God's presense is always with us, it's up to us to notice and savor those moments. Using our creativity is a way of expressing those sweet times.
 
Grace & peace on the journey ~
deAnn

Steps of Courage

For A New Beginning

by John O'Donohue

To Bless the Space Between Us

In out-of-the-way places of the heart,

Where your thoughts never think to wander,

The beginning has been quietly forming,

Waiting until you were ready to emerge.

For a long time it has watched your desire,

Feeling the emptiness growing inside you,

Noticing how you willed yourself on,

Still unable to leave what you had outgrown.

It watched you play with the seduction of safety

And the gray promises that sameness whispered,

Heard the waves of turmoil rise and relent,

Wondered would you always live like this.

Then the delight, when your courage kindled,

And out you stepped onto new ground,

Your eyes young again with energy and dream,

A path of plenitude opening before you.

Though your destination is not yet clear

You can trust the promise of this opening;

Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning

That is at one with your life's desire.

Awaken your spirit to adventure;

Hold nothing back, learn to find ease in risk;

Soon you will be home in a new rhythm,

For your soul senses the world that awaits you.

This is one of my favorites by John O'Donohue. It leaves me speechless and even breathless. Life is crazy. We may find ourselves standing in that "doorway" of a new beginning at different times in life. Standing on the stoop scared to leave the tired familiar "comfortable" place yet, not courageous enough to take the first step out into the energized unfamiliar risk - the new beginning God has for you. All I know is that we must trust Him. As the line says, "You can trust the promise of this opening; Unfurl yourself into the grace of beginning that is at one with your life's desire." We desire to trust Him. We move slowly. Our courage builds. A verse that comes to mind is: "Wait patiently for the Lord, be brave and courageous. Yes, wait patiently for the Lord." Maybe you are waiting for the door of a new beginning. Maybe you've been waiting for years. Or maybe you know the door is right in front of you, yet you are timid and unsure. Be brave and courageous. The Lord to guide your next step, just ask Him to walk with you, closely.

Does Mr. O'Donohue's poem (blessing) speak to the "out-of-the-way places of your heart"? If so, don't dismiss it - take time and sit before God and offer that feeling up to Him. Ask Him to reveal your new beginning and listen closely for His voice and encouragement.

grace & peace on the creative journey,
deAnn